The other night, I ordered online and used a coupon for a $15.99 Large Super Supreme Pizza, light sauce, plus 10 Wings. Here is what we got:

1: One rock hard, cold pizza completely devoid of sauce, a handful of veggies tossed around for color, and a few chunks of chicken: I kid you not, the crust had cinnamon in it. A lot of cinnamon. I was starving because I'd been sick and hadn't eaten anything for two days been sick) so I did eat some, but then I spent most of the night studying the painting on the far wall of my bathroom, from my vantage point on the commode. My boyfriend was sick to his stomach too.

The box was poked full of holes. On the top, the bottom, the sides. Note: Someone with a large knife and a grudge against cardboard is working in one of your restaurants. I have photos if you'd like to see them.

2: Invisible wings: Not a wing in sight, and that's all I wanted. I did not want chicken-cinnamon pizza.

3: 3 little bottles of Pepsi, because they were out of the two-liters. (This was fine)

All for the low, low price of $25.

I called the manager who said something meaningful, like, "You should never order online." For some reason, this did not console me, so I clicked the "Contact Us" link on the company's website to do some griping. The site asked several questions, then I typed my grievances into a comment box. When I clicked "send" to register your complaint, nothing happened. A message popped up which said to stop entering invalid characters. After trying for about 45 minutes, I realized that the site considers letters of the alphabet invalid characters. So, I looked up the toll-free number and called.

A very nice girl listened to my tale of woe, and summoning all of her customer service training, empathized with me, and repeated my complaint back to me. "Ma'am, I'm so sorry that your order was wrong your pizza was cold and had no sauce and chicken on it and that you did not get your coupon. We'll have a member of the team call you tomorrow." It's now day two, and I haven't heard a word. She asked when the best time to call was, and I told them that it could be midnight- I didn't care. So I don't think that it's a time factor that's prevented anyone from calling.

You know, if during that very first call, the manager had said something empathetic, to the effect of, "Gosh, I'm sorry that this happened to you," I might have forgotten the whole deal. But nooooo. I'd been sick and hadn't eaten in quite a while, and this was a huge financial decision for us at this time in history. I've never cried over chicken wings before, but since the food they delivered tasted like the cook may have been suffering from an LSD flashback, I did get really upset. Throughout all of this, I was nice and polite, and thanked both the manager and the customer service rep profusely. I wish I'd gotten some kindness in return. All it would have taken was a phone call.

I just wanted to vent. I don't want anything at this point. I doubt I'll ever return, and if I do, it certainly won't be to the one I ordered from.