Cell Phone Incident at Dickenson Theater

What a well written letter. And normally, I cannot stand zero
tolerance policies. They often defy logic and common sense.
However, despite the nicely articulate letter you wrote, you received
an equally professional and polite response.
I do not agree with the "No refund" policy; but, there is absolutely
no reason your daughter could not have left her phone on in vibrate
status. Then when you, in my opinion, rudely interupted her rare night
out, to tell them "nothing was wrong", probably knowing full well they
would be going to a movie.

I'm sure everyone feels they are the exception to the rule. But,
seriously, as you stated, she could not completely turn the phone off,
so why not leave it on vibrate? Seriously. Then go out and answer it
in the hallway or the lobby.

I'm sorry, but, I disagree with you. Even though you have written one
of the best letters I have seen.

My oldest works at a theater and it is clearly posted EVERYWHERE that
if you use your phone or device in the theater you will be asked to
leave,no refunds.

Have you ever been in an $8 x 2 movie out for your 21 anniversary with
your spouse and see a dozen people use theirs?

That may have been my 10th night out in 15 years!

I'm very sure if they asked everyone for them they would come up with
a great excuse for why they broke the rules and disrupted the movie
for everyone else.

I'm old enough to know that if my phone vibrates in my purse,I step
out.

These are the rules and those raising kids better learn that.Without
them there is chaos and lots of kids in jail at taxpayers expense.

Your child doesn't need a status update on her infant while you,her
parents babysit.So much going on with all this,I don't know where to
begin

Reminds me of the people that park in the fire lane at the store or
leave their kids or pets in hot cars and say "I was only going to go
in for a second"
Follow the rules like the rest.The world would be a much better
place!

You have to have a license to drive a car but anyone can have a
kid...

OK this is something I am very adamant about. People using their
cellphone during a movie. Do they not realize how rude it is? How
distracting it is while watching a movie, when some one decides, oh, I
am more important than everyone else. I will just take this call, and
talk during the movie.

It is obnoxious and quite frankly I support the action taken by this
theater. Their response in letter was great too and I hope that in the
future, your family learns to respect this theaters policy and not use
a cell phone during the movie.

I was a General Manager at several different chains and the response
you received from them was excellent. Next time your daughter will
step out to take that call though, won't she!! I hate going to a
movie now and see people texting, and answering their phones. It
distracts and is irritating. They can't really force anyone to turn
their phone off - really only encourage it - but the can absolutely
not allow them to use it. It irritates me when people lack common
sense. They honestly could have given a refund though. The argument
has been made in the past that once given a refund when someone
returns they are technically trespassing.

Seriously? You're complaining over something you helped instigate?
WOW! I am with the theatre on this one. Your call didn't constitute
an emergency. As the grandmother, maybe you thought your call would
alleviate any fears or worries; but honestly, I'd like to think if she
were fearful or worried, she would have called YOU long before the
movie started.

It's a rarity NOT to see "no cell phone" postings within a movie
theatre. They're everywhere because people can be such jerks and rude
to boot. Each time I go to the movies, right before the previews
start, there's a clip of NO CELL PHONES!

The bottom line, you had no real reason to call your daughter other
than to find out what she and her fiance were out doing at the time.
You may have even called just to see how much longer they were going
to be out cause you were ready for them to get their kid.

Either way, this mess was your doing and quite frankly, you owe the
theatre manager an apology for trying to make them the bad guys and as
others have said, you owe your daughter movie tickets.

Don't get me wrong, you started this; but your daughter is not without
her faults too. That call could have been taken outside of the
listening displeasure of others.

Good for them. I go to the movies to see a movie, not to hear some
talking on the phone or texting. Have enough decency to excuse
yourself for a few moments. Two seconds away from the movie would have
let her stay.

I fully applaud the responses here. Cell phone usage (or rather,
abuse) is one of the scourges of modern society.

It is sickening how people feel the need to foist their boring private
lives on the rest of us, to the detriment of public peace.

During a 5-minute period, 4 people came out the door with cell phones
pressed to their ears. Apparently they were called while sitting in
the audience.

This is fantastic! I wish Dickinson ran theaters in NYC! It's seems to
me the obvious solution would have been for you to have not called
except in an emergency and if your daughter wanted to check in and see
how you were doing she could have left the theater for a minute. I
imagine this is exactly why Dickinson has this amazing policy ( I
really am amazed by this- this gives me renewed hope in the world!). I
am curious as to why you would call someone for a non emergency when
you knew they were in a theater? Anyway, I'm glad they responded to
you and it seem like everyone will have a better understanding of how
to handle this the next time.

I'm with the theater on this one as well. And I think you owe your
daughter 2 movie tickets, not the theater.

How refeshing it is to see a theater actually do something about cell
phones. They are a huge distraction... Pay attention Wehrenberg!

I have to side with the theater here. You can't be answering your
phone unless it's a serious emergency. If it were me, I would have
said "I'll call you for an update on the baby." If it was in fact an
emergency, then being kicked out of a theater would have been the
least of my concerns.

with the other responses here. Your daughter was in the wrong to take
the call during the movie. No matter how quiet she THOUGHT she was
being, it's still disruptive to everyone around her as the management
very clearly illustrated in their responses to you.

Did your daughter think those trailers at the beginning of the show
telling patrons to refrain from using their phones didn't pertain to
her?

Furthermore, you knew she and her fiancee were going to see a movie.
Unless the baby was in danger, why was it necessary for you to call
right then to give her an update? Was the baby not in capable hands
with you???

And as to frequenting the other local theater, I'd be willing to bet
money that if this same situation occurred there, the exact same
result would happen.

I just looked into prepurchasing tickets to Ironman2 at the IMAX
theatre tomorrow night. $16 EACH.

If I had spent $32 to see a movie (one that I don't even care if I
see) and someone answered their cell phone in that 2 hour 15 minute
period...

...be glad that didn't happen.

It's bad enough that loser parents brought their toddler and
eight-year-old child to "Kick-Ass" (loved the movie, but it was very
disturbing in its violence, language (a 12 year old uses the C word,
for starters), and general mayhem).

Some. People.

You should turn you phone off. Its not my falut that she has a kid at
home. She should have gotten out of her seat and walk out of the
theatre!!! We pay good hard money to watch sometimes crappy movies and
the last thing 100% of the people watching dont want to hear you phone
go off. Do everyone a faver and stay home. Let the rest of us watch in
peace.

Parents need to practice good manners and consideration for their
fellow human beings just like everybody else. Having a child does not
exempt anybody from using common courtesy. People need to turn their
cell phones off when they attend a movie or other event. Valerie B.'s
statement that her daughter "has an infant at home and cannot be
expected to do this" is outrageous. Valerie was wrong to call her
daughter when there was no emergency. The daughter was wrong to
answer the phone inside the theater. The theater did the right thing
when they kicked the daughter and her fiancé out without a refund.

I never turn OFF my cell phone (not even to sleep).... I will turn the
phone to vibrate. When in a place where I cannot/should not talk
(movie theater, driving, Temple); I will actually IGNORE an incoming
call and let it go to voicemail. I will then retrieve my message (the
phone is to my ear and I am only listening); and if important enough,
I will step out and return the call. This is a case where a voicemail
would have been sufficient; and a text message would have even been
better.

If the customer chose to let the call go to voicemail, or instructed
the caregiver to send a text message instead; none of this would have
happened.

Parenthood is not a Get Out of Politeness Free card, and I am sorry to
see that this letter is simply one more piece of evidence that it's
being abused as such in today's world.

Being a parent does not mean that you can sit comfortably in a movie
that other people have paid around $10 to see, and take cell phone
calls as you normally would. If you absolutely must take a call, you
must excuse yourself from the theater, and take the call in the
lobby.

As another replier has already said, theater management knew that your
daughter took a cell call because other patrons complained. People do
not like to pay money to see shows, then have it interrupted by
someone's rudeness and complete lack of thought for anyone but
themselves and their own convenience.

When you are in a public space, regardless of whether you have kids or
not, you are obligated to have some consideration for the comfort and
enjoyment of others. Period. There is no "b-but I'm a mommy,
therefore the rules of sharing public spaces in polite society do not
apply to me, and I am exempt from exhibiting good manners." Um, no.
Do you want to go out and enjoy time in public spaces? Then you and
your entire party are quiet during movies and performances, and
considerate of others who are just trying to get out of their houses
and have fun, too.

I'm glad that the theater asked your daughter to leave, by doing so
they did the right thing.

I don't want to be disturbed by cell phones in theaters! If your
daughter was that worried about her child she always had the option to
stay home.

Yes, I know it's difficult for young parents to get out, but they made
the choice to have a child now they get to deal with the difficulties
and inconveniences surrounding that decision. Their choice does not
make it OK to disturb the movie watching of others.

If your daughter is old enough to be a mother, she should be old
enough to write her own complaint letter to the theater manager, by
having her MOTHER write the letter for her it just makes her look even
more immature.

Please take your business to the other theater, the theater where the
disturbance was called will not miss your business because the people
who don't want to listen to cell phones will be encouraged to go to
movies again due to their zero tolerance policy.

It is rude to use a cell phone in a movie. This is a good policy in my
opinion.

Furthermore, your daughter is 18 and a parent. Why on earth would you
call the theatre about this? This is HER battle, not her mother's.

You're not entitled to much in this life, including going to the
movies if you can't get through the evening without using the cell
phone.

This letter is so aggravating.

The state I live in (Oregon) has a zero tolerance LAW on the use of
cell phones while driving a car. An exception is made for
emergencies. If your daughter was pulled over for using her cell
phone while driving for the same reason you stated (an update on her
baby), she would get a ticket. There are some places where it is
impolite, unsafe, and simply wrong to use a cell phone. The movie
theater is one of them. Instead of complaining, perhaps be glad that
the worst thing that happened was that she was asked to leave the film
(and in the end was compensated).

You know how they knew to ask your daughter to leave the movie?
Because her cell phone use was apparent to others.

I'm sure everyone would have understood if her sitter had called with
an emergency. Of course, they wouldn't have had to understand because
she would have needed to leave, thus preempting enforcement of the
no-tolerance party.

For that matter, I'm sure everyone would have understood if she'd
called home while her husband was buying the tickets, getting the
popcorn, etc., before the movie started, and then let you know not to
call her for the next couple of hours except in an emergency. But
again, they wouldn't have had to understand because she wouldn't have
bothered anyone.

And I'm sure everyone would have understood if the phone had vibrated
and she had stepped out of the theater before taking it out of her
pocket in case it was an important call. But once again, they
wouldn't have had to understand because nobody would have known she
had a phone call.

It's not like your daughter didn't have options. She had plenty of
options that were respectful of the people around her and that did not
involve being out of contact in case something happened with her baby.
But she didn't take them. Where she went wrong was in having a
babysitter who called to give her a non-emergency "status update" --
rather than calling home at a time that was convenient for her (and
everyone around her) for her to be talking on the phone or instructing
the sitter not to call her except in an emergency -- and treating that
call like an emergency -- rather than assuming she could afford to
take 30 seconds to step out to find out what was going on or just
instructing the babysitter to call the theater if there was an
emergency and turning off her phone. And, yeah, is inconsiderate of
other people and it is a perfectly good reason to ask her to leave.

Movie theaters shouldn't have to choose between jamming all cell phone
calls and losing their customer base.

Frankly, I think you owe your daughter a night out.

You called to give a status in the middle of the movie. Unless there
was an emergency (which there wasn't), you really didn't need to do
that.

When parents, especially new parents, have that rare night out, let
them enjoy it. Don't hassle them for attention and/or give them
"status updates" unless they request them. And then, if they do,
figure out a convenient time. Such as before the movie starts.

It is annoying when someone in the movie thearte is talking or texting
on their cell NOW I don't care if people have them on, but have them
on silent vibrate and if it does go off, look at who is calling
discreetly as you can (without having your phone light up the thearte)
and if that person is important to talk to then leave and go out in
the lobby to talk with them.

My phone is always on silent vibrate when I am at thearte's, plays,
restaurants, meetings etc.

You know....

this is why i put my phone on silent when i'm in the movies.

If I get a call, I check to see who it is and if I need to reply or
answer, I get up and leave my seat and head to the back, where I won't
disturb anyone else.

You're lucky they gave you free tickets to another movie. IMO you
didn't deserve that.

Who calls someone in a theater to give a status update when everything
is ok? A text message maybe,but we all know cell phones are prohibited
in theaters....why would you sabotage them like that?

The theater owner and theater did absolutely nothing wrong here.

No refund should be given either.

Every theater I have been in for the past 5 years has a big banner run
on the screen before the movie starts, regarding the no cell phone
policies. I would fall on the side of those who have no toleration at
all for a ringing cell phone during a movie.

The phone could have been set to silent, and your daughter could have
walked to the lobby to answer it, or could have called right back from
an appropriate spot.

If the situation is such that she has to be in instant contact, then a
movie theater is a very poor choice for a night out. My compliments
to the theater for taking the rights of the majority into
consideration.

If movie theatres have a zero tolerance policy in regards to cell
phone usage and people still insist they need to have their cell
phones on for 2 hours, then I feel they shouldn't be going to a movie
for a "special night out". There are many other activities people can
do for a "special night out" where they can still have their cell
phones on.

I disagree with this theatre's exception policy. If they have a zero
toleranc policy then it should be just that - no exceptions.

This was NOT an emergency. I have zero sympathy. OP's daughter had
other options and chose, instead, to break other people's immersion
and spoil THEIR evening.

If OP's daughter felt the need to be able to answer the phone, she
could have had the phone on vibrate and left the auditorium to answer
it. Sure, it would have been an inconvenience for OP's daughter
(She'd have missed some of the movie!), but it sure beats
inconveniencing someone else.

It is situations like this that have caused me personally to stop
visiting the movies. Everyone thinks they are a "special snowflake"
and should be the exception to the rule, and in most cases, the
theatre doesn't do anything about it.

Theatres are having a tough go of it. Unlike other products, the
price of tickets can't really be cut, because these mult-million
(billion) dollar films aren't costing less to make and the money has
to come from SOMEWHERE. Theatres PAY to rent said movies and receive
very little profit on the ticket sales and essentually live off of
concession profit. Freebie tickets and discounts have to be covered
by the theatre. If anyone thinks I am joking, I live in a relatively
small area and we have ticket-people counters from the assorted movie
companies in about once every other week or so. If you even screw up
once, the companies can decide to no longer show certain movies at
your business. Less people are attending movies because of the
increased costs, and because many people would rather NOT have to deal
with rude people who feel they are entitled to do whatever they want
at the expense of everyone else.

YOU may not think it was a big deal, but is OP or OP's daughter
willing to take responsibility to pay for everyone else's ticket in
the theatre if they have a complaint, however small? I think not.

Obviously, OP's daughter wasn't THAT subtle, because someone obviously
noticed if they were asked to leave.

People can watch things at home more and more nowadays and have less
incentive to go out to the movies. Those who go to the movies do so
for an escape and don't need to hear screaming/fussy children with too
young of an attention span and people on cellphones and texting
devices. You won't see this policy change anytime soon. I absolutely
guarantee you will see it enforced more and more as time goes on.

Thanks to OP for posting their response to OP as well, so we can see
what a fine, upstanding company this is, to not only give such a
friendly, detailed and professional response, but also to offer OP's
daughter free admission at a future date. It's too bad OP seems to be
missing the point.

Sorry, but that does not qualify as "new mother". 7 days, yes. 7
weeks, sure.

You stated that your fiance is the one making the calls. That's
hugely different from situation here, where Granny is calling the mom.

You said that your daughter answered her phone quietly. She may have
said "hello" quietly, but you weren't in the theater. You don't know
how loud her ring was, if it was on vibrate, or what. To me it's
obvious that she disturbed other movie goers, otherwise she would not
have asked to leave.

had a policy like this and enforced it so strictly, it would motivate
me to go to the movies. Its lack of enforcement has made me decide to
wait until the movie comes out on Blu-Ray. Nothing drives me more
crazy than paying $10 to listen to, or see distracting lights from a
cell phone in a dark theatre.

Many moons ago - before cell phones - my mom and dad went out on a
date night. My brother and i were at home with a sitter. The sitter
knew where they were in case of emergency. There was some sort of
emergency at the house - I don't remember any more how it happened but
the end result was my brother needing stiches. The sitter called the
place my parents were at - my parents were paged/found and they met at
the hospital. All without the use of a cell phone. amazing.

My mother is a teacher. Before cell phones, people would deliver
messages to the class room if there was an emergency. Which is why my
mother does not believe that people need a cell phone during class and
will take them if she hears them ring.

As you can imagine, I am with the theatre. Your daughter could have
set her phone to vibrate. she could see you called, go outside and
phoned you back as well. She was being rude to everyone else. And
since I only get out to movie about twice a year, I wish all movie
theatres would do this.

Sorry, I'm with the theater on this. There is no reason for a well
call. If you really needed to assure your daughter that her baby was
OK, you should have set a preset time she could step outside the
theater and call you. Since you raised your daughter and perhaps
other children I have to assume you are a responsible adult that can
handle an emergency if it comes up.

It's so odd that we all got along fine without cell phones etc. There
is no reason your daughter can't get along without hers for a few
hours.

What would you have done 15 or 20 years ago? Hardly anyone had a cell
phone in 1990, but we all got by somehow.

I have to side with the theater on this one, people pay good money to
see and hear a movie, not your (or anyone else's) conversation, set it
on vibrate and go out into the hall.

Good for the theater. I am tired of everyone thinking the rules don't
apply to them just because they ________ (insert whatever reason
here). No one ever called me when I was out without my kids to tell me
nothing was wrong.....my mom never called me at all when she was
babysitting. She figured a night out was for relaxing and if she
called me I would panic. If I needed a status update I called her.

There is absolutely no reason your daughter couldn't have stepped out
to take the phone call or call you back. I have two kids myself, I
understand how it is. I also don't believe in taking phone calls
inside the movie theater.

I think the theater is being more than generous by inviting your
daughter on them.

Didn't you know that they'd be at a movie?

If the parent is worried, the parent should call the sitter to make
sure everything is OK. No sitter should be interrupting a parent's
night out if there's no problem.

Especially if the sitter is Grandma.

Kyle, the manager, did the right thing. Even "vibrate" can be heard
by others. For example, I've managed to lose a few pounds. If
wearing certain pants, I am thrilled to say that I can't feel the
vibration!! But my kids can tell me that I have a call or a message.


And the light from cell phones is extremely distracting. I don't pay
matinee prices to be distracted by others, much less evening show
prices.

Your adult daughter can print out the response to Mommy's complaint
and get a free movie. What else can you ask?

Your daughter might suggest that you treat her as an adult and a
parent, and stop calling her every hour. Stop making her complaints
for her. She's a grown-up with a child and a fiance. Step back and
let her be that.

And my opinion is the opposite: this policy is completely acceptable,
and I applaud the theater for enforcing it. I also think Kyle did an
excellent job of clarifying the policy in his response.

What I can't fathom is how you claim to understand there is some type
of posting "saying cell phones are not allowed" and that it is
generally "a request done for the courtesy of other patrons" (both
quoted phrases in your letter), yet you're complaining because your
daughter used her cell phone where it wasn't allowed which was, of
course, discourteous to other patrons, and was asked to leave because
of it.

"In these cases, they are asked to put the phone on vibrate, and then
step out of the auditorium into the hallway to answer the phone out of
common courtesy for their fellow patrons."

This really is the most common sense solution. I'm surprised your
daughter didn't think of it first.

I totally support the theater on this one, esp. since it wasn't an
urgent call. There wasn't a problem, right? And she answered the
phone in the theater, correct? Sorry, but that's not OK. She needed
to step out to answer, or return your call. Yes, it's hard to get an
evening out when you have a newborn, but they have no idea what the
other patrons had to do to get their evening out, and it's not fair to
them.

"We have a zero tolerance policy on cell phones," but the letter went
on far after that.

I also have a zero tolerance policy on cell phones in theaters, on
planes, in restaurants, in stores, while driving behind a car that is
in my way because the driver is concentrating on talking, not driving.
Turn the darned things off.

I wholeheartedly support the theater's policy, and I hope most
theaters follow suit.

If I lived in this area, I would tell everyone I knew about the
wonderful apology your daughter received, and tell all my friends to
join me in support of the Central Mall 10 Theatre. Bravo.

Valerie B.,

Unless I am missing something Kyle did an excellent job stating the
position of the theater on this topic. Considering that it posted in
the theater and most likely in the coming attractions clips.

He then did the unexpected by offering your daughter and fiancee a
complimentary movie.

I'd turn that frown upside down

BillR.

Good for the theater!!!!