a very displeased customer wishing your company to make some changes to its menu

HOLY SHIT you have got a serious lack of grammar and spelling skills.

Please, for the love of everyone who attempts to read this crap, redo
this letter with proper grammar and punctuation and spelling!

PLEASE!

I couldn't read all this, my brain hurts far too much from trying to
decipher this. In any case, I'll assume that at the end of this letter
you're asking for freebie and write you off as a gimmie pig. Please,
for the sake of everyone concerned, go back to school and retake
English.

Okay, now that the aspirin has kicked in - one of the first things you
say is "I haven't ordered from your company in years"...they'll stop
right there.

"Oh yes, ye who is grammatically challenged, we will rush right out
and make all these changes just for you!"

AND COTTAGE CHEESE IN LASAGNA! GOOD LORD CHILD! THAT WILL NOT WORK!
EWWW!!!

"your company only has black olives and i like the green ones"

then further down:

"i like pasta salads too with rontini elbow and small shells pasta
with small diced onions cucumber mayo ranch dressing small diced fine
green peppers sliced BLACK OLIVES and sliced green olives"

browned sausage ground beef - uh, child - sausage and ground beef are
TWO separate meats.

Charleston, West Virginia? - hmmm...Why don't you open your own pizza
shop and serve only the things that you like...you can call it
"Trailer Park Pizza Parlor" or "Trailer Princess Pizza"

I'm sure Pizza Hut will get right on these demands!

Two words: punctuation marks. I'm not even attempting to read this
mess.

Sarah, appropriate grammar and punctuation would help further your
cause. This letter is the rambling of an uneducated brat. Sounds
like you are looking for excuses to bilk a company. You need to go
back to school. When you get an education, then learn to write a
letter and call back. Pizza Hut has horrid pizza, poor delivery
times, and slick, misleading advertising...yes. Learn to say what you
want, not ramble on like a stupid spoiled brat.

I lost interest in this letter about three lines down, which is
probably what the company will do.

Somewhere there is an English teacher sobbing hysterically.

Try using punctuation and capitalization next time.

My 15 year old daughter says two words: "Grammar class!"

AHHH!! USE SOME FRICKEN FULL STOPS!! I HATE it when people don't use
full stops and punctuation! What, are you too good for grammer?!
ARRRGHHH!!! *goes insane*

Please, for the love of all that is holy, enroll in a Punctuation 101
course somewhere.

I agree, Pizza hut stinks; they send out old pizzas, lots of false
advertising, the resuting product looks NOTHING like it does on TV,
shame on you, I also happen to know you don't wash the vegies you put
on your pizzas, Shame!

Oh my, the ranting of a child.

You should have let your parents edit your ramblings. They will not
take a "complaint" like this seriously.

Unfortuantly this letter makes everyone else with an actual complaint
go unheard. How can you expect people to want to listen to you
when they can't even follow what your saying among the lack of
punctuation and slang. And throwing a "tis" in here and there doesn't
make you sound any more intelligent. It just makes you sound like a
jerk.

I had a problem with my local Pizza Hut (all of which are owned
independently... so asking for menue items is a tad unreasonable). But
my problem wasn't "they don't have green olives and browned
hamburger!". My problem was that pieces of my pizza were missing and
what was left was burnt. But the thing is, you can always call the
customer service hotline. I did and I got a cupon for 2 free pizzas
however I want them. Crappy pizza you pay 20 bucks for is one
thing--but free crappy pizza is another!

Stephanie-Fresno California

I hate pizza hut. They used to have the best pizza in the world bar
none. Then shitty Pepsi bought them out and they completely ruined it.
All their crusts used to be made from scracth every day. For about 15
years they have used the nastiest tasting pre frozen shit that they
call a pizza crust. The problem is 80 percent of the people buying
their pizza now dont even know what I am talking about. They are
content with the carp Pizza Hut serves and accept it as good pizza.
Its hore shit crap I wouldnt feed to anybody. I hate you Pizza Hut. I
used to eat your pizza 5 times a week. I would lay awake at night and
think about a piping hot pizza fresh from your oven. Remember the days
when they packed their pizzas in paper huts. Stapled shut. You would
carry them home and open them and the staem would pore out. It was
pure money in the bank every Efffing time. You guys suck. I hate you.
I hate Pepsi I hate you I hate you I hate you. Go eff yourself
PizzaHut.BYE

What a rambling mess of a letter this is. Hey - have you ever heard
of capitalization and punctuation. It's hard to take this person
seriously at all.

This just gave me a huge headache.

"i haven't ordered from your company in years" ... "and you all used
to be my fave pizza place"

How do you know the menu so well without buying in years? Did you go
to the restaurant, get a table, look at the menu, and just go home?

Difficult read. Would love to see your suggestions itemized somehow or
in bullets. More suggestions replacing complaints because I bet this
could be good if written better.

Yay.. now EVERYONE knows how much of a MORON Sarah Miller of
Charleston, WV is! and where exactly does ANYONE in the US use :'s in
a price??? your killing me here... haha.. I woulnd't be surprized if
this was really a 5 year old who had her mommy write it for her and
made the child type it for her. This is ALMOST just like every letter
on here. The person wants the place to cater to THEIR every need.
Never gonna happen hunny. Oh, and I would suggest some English classes
over the summer ;-). This reply is especially for Poetry_babe.. since
she has made EVERY effort into constantly harrassing me:) She has made
yet ANOTHER name on here.. my sister found it.. e-mail me on Myspace
if you want it. Haha shes so pathetic...Have a great Day!!!

Um.....well.....I agree with the shorter delivery times. Thats about
all I got from this letter. I'm not the best at spelling or grammar by
a long shot. In fact I have (at times) admited to posibly being the
worst. Thank you for proving me wrong. Honestly...at least hit return
before putting your name and one period. That's all I ask for. At
least then we could call it a runon sentence, as it is all we can call
it is a runon. Sigh......there is just to much to say. When someone
like me can't get trough your letter you have problems.

sarah i heard there is a huge 25 topping pizza at the bottom of the
sago mine go in and take a look!!!you slobola

blah blah blah things you liked were taken off the menu, they should
add other Italian specialties, blah blah you want things for free...
my head hurts! One word for you - PUNCTUATION!!!! First of all, go
to Olive Garden if you want lasagna. It's PIZZA Hut... not Lasagna
Hut. Secondly, I'm from WV... it takes forever to get anywhere so
don't give the delivery guy a hard time! Now, on to correct your
headache of a letter. Had you punctuated anything or not used words
such as "fave" or placed an order which you would like to get for
free, maybe this letter could have been taken seriously. You don't
decide the prices or the deals that a restaurant chain has. That
particular unit probably doesn't have the authority to either! It's
like you asked for a deal that suited your
family/friends/lifestyle/income. Pizza Hut doesn't issue "coupons for
Sarah Miller," they issue coupons according to what they want to sell
the most. Let me try that one if that's the case! Yea, I'd like to
get my 4 of my fave pizzas loaded with free extra everything with free
dipping sauces and three 2-liters of soda and wings and cinnamon
things and anything else you'd like to throw in there for $20.00.
Nope it didn't work, although it was a good run-on sentence! Maybe
you should consider writing a letter which is more professional and
maybe use Word to add in a comma or period. You have good suggestions
like pasta salads and such, but your letter is so eye-aching that it
just makes me angry and want to throw it away. Don't try to say you
want something for free, just suggest some items that may make the
menu more appetizing. People need to learn that in order to get
changes made to a company, you don't have to threaten to not return or
beg for compensation! A suggestion goes a long way! Simply saying "I
think this would improve your [menu, store, etc]... I didn't much care
for the [add item here]" can get their minds churning to consider your
idea. People just always want something given to them for free, and
then they still complain! Restaurants especially want to know what
guests like and don't like. They thrive on feedback. A restaurant
wouldn't survive if they kept saying "Oh how everyone hates this dish,
but let's keep it on there and maybe one day it will sell." Just a
suggestion or two for you to ALL of you complainers out there as
well!! Although in this case punctuation is the biggest one!! Oh!!
before I forget - thanks for the great recipe on pasta salad! I'm
sure they will make it just the way you think everyone in the world
will like it - it actually makes me sick thinking of all of that in a
dish together! By the way it sounds, you know how to cook it all - go
for it Chef Boy-you-must-be-amazing! What's the oven temperature on
that Lasagna with cottage cheese instead of ricotta? 350 I'm sure!

Reading this letter makes me think of the Verizon (?) commercial with
the "Caffinated Cheerleader", talking on the cell phone, non-stop,
non-breathing in front of all the laboratory scientists.

As I'm reading, I feel myself becoming light-headed from the lack of
oxygen to my brain, since there are no breaks in the verbiage to allow
the reader to draw breath.

According to the Pizza Hut website, both kinds of olives are
available. So is the Cheese Lovers.

http://www.pizzahut.com/menu/

They might have some of the other items you'd like, but I will not try
to wade through your letter again to find out.

LMAO!

i can't even begin to fathem what this complaint is about because the
lack of punctuation in this letter has made my eyes glaze over and
roll back into my head as i couldnt even bring myself to read past the
first paragraph because of the headache it was giving me and i have no
doubt that pizza hut will not even bother to respond to this complaint
because it would take a team of interpreters to understand what the
writer is saying if only she would have bothered to punctuate and
capitalize a lot of strained retinas would have been prevented and
although i like bacon bits black olives and ranch dressing too i hope
sarah miller of charleston west virginia will pay my optometrists
copay thank you

So... you write like crap and you go ON AND ON about everything you
hate about this restaurant, then you demand free food? Grow the eff
up.

I think everyone else basically covered it. I'm not a fan of
critiquing spelling, punctuation, and grammar, but Sarah Miller of
Charleston definately went overboard and lost my sypmathy vote!

Horrible, horrible letter. MY EYES! MY EYES!!!!

Argh. Simply horrible letter. Can't stress that enough.

Other than that, I'll just say that if you don't like what a
restaurant has to offer, go somewhere else. It's as simple as that.

Thanks a lot! Now I have to walk around cross-eyed all day just from
trying to get through your letter. Sheesh. You know, this calls for
an apology to any and all other letter writers that I've critiqued for
their lack of letter-writing ability. Compared to this letter writer,
you all should be contenders for the Pulitzer Prize.

This is a really, really bad letter, princess. It's so horrid I can't
understand your requests. Seems to me you'd like the world on a
platter, the owner to rope the moon for you, with a little slice of
heaven on the side.

Sheesh, guess you can't kill a person for asking for the things you
request, but you sure can condemn them to writer's hell for always and
forever. Please, if you wish to grace us with your presence in the
future and see it fit to complain about something worthwhile, I beg of
you, use periods. I'm not even going to ask for punctuation or even
capitalization, please use periods.

Light travels faster than sound.
This is why some people seem bright until you hear them speak.(by
Anonymous)


Perhaps, Pizza Hut could send someone to do mi'lady's delicates by
hand of course,line dried at high noon and whilst waiting for madam's
delicates to release their moisture to the wind, they could air out
madam's impeccably clean white eyelet duvet cover with matching sham.
Perhaps fluff milady's pillow and place a piece of exquisite belgian
chocolate wrapped in pink foil with orange ribbons on a small
chartreuse satin pillow with Irish Lace for exactly that purpose. Can
they draw you a bath? (fill the tub for you so you don't get scaulded
or break an acrylic nail) Perhaps it's warm in Milady sarah miller of
charleston west virginia's sleeping quarters.Mmmmm Mint Julep's on the
porch with the smell of lilacs in bloom.
Could Pizza Hut possible send some well muscled cleanly shaven and
oil glistened blonde loincloth clad gentlemen with imported ostrich
feather fans from Aukland New Zealand to gently move the "bad air"
from milady's chamber? Oh and please send Martha Stewart Personally to
serve her the pizza (that i can't for the life of me figgure out)and
to do Milady a loverly bouquet of freshly cut vanilla orchids and
lady's slippers with the faintest touch of baby's breath and lily's of
the valley? Maybe gingerly hold the two liter bottles of soda (pop or
fizz or whatever they call it) while Madam Sara guzzles it down.
Martha can gently dab her lips with a high thread count egyptian
cotton towel.

NOT!!!!

What's Up With This Letter? First a serious word of advice Sarah
Miller of Charleston West Virginia. Everyone except Sarah Miller of
Charleston West Virginia DO NOT I repeat DO NOT READ THIS
PARAGRAPH!!!!!!!!!!!!There's this thing called "search" on the
internet. I'm not going into any details here but anyone can plug in
the name and city and mapquest will show them EXACTLY WHERE YOU LIVE
along with DRIVING DIRECTIONS and the QUICKEST ROUTE or the SCENIC
ROUTE for those who like to sight see and learn something. If they
wanted to there are ways to get this thing called a PHONE NUMBER.
H_E_L_L_O!!!!!!!!!!!!! So I wouldn't post my name and state which the
shared letter option CLEARLY AND EXPLICITLY TELLS YOU IN NO UNCERTAIN
TERMS TO REMOVE FROM YOUR LETTER BEFORE POSTING to Planet Feeback. Now
promise me you'll never ever do that again! Please????? And stay away
from My Space or any website like that!! I'm being serious here. It's
a big mistake. (not good at all). Don't run with scissors too.

Ok, Now everyone else can open your eyes now!! Come on you're NOT
listening!!! OPEN YOUR EYES!! Ok be ignorant see if I care!!!!

I think Pizza Hut should elevate you to the CEO of the company. You
should get each of your demands met in a timely manner. AND they
should have every single (and married or partnered) employee that
works for them line up and give you wrapped presents, a controlling
interest of at least 51 percent of the stock options of the company. A
yacht and Limo, maybe a Chalet in Switzerland so you can count your
fortunes in one of their handy very private and posh banks.Your very
own Swavarski Crystal encrusted Tiara along with three full time tiara
polishers. How about a big mansion right next to Brittney Spears???
Perhaps you're happy where you are and they can do an "Extreme
Makeover Home Edition" program all about YOU!!! FREE STUFF A
BONANZA!!!!!!
How DARE they treat you this way! Who do they think they're dealing
with? You have to be more specific on your preferred race of olives.
When you say green do you mean the Calamata Greek style or the ones
that are pitted and stuffed with pimento's or almonds?(my personal
favorite is black oil cured olives- the wrinkled kind in oil not the
plump kind in water...yuck) All your other menu preferences make
perfect and logical sense but you forgot Tirami Su for dessert, bbq
sauce and pineapple(Dole, chunks NOT rings in heavy syrup NOT
pineapple juice) with anchovies(in olive oil, not the ones in coarse
salt)Oh and Truffles from France. Can't forget that and tons of
Saffron from India, hand picked!!!! And don't forget the complimentary
personalized fodder bag.

Good Luck Sarah Miller of Charleston West Virginia! If they don't
respond in a timely manner, I'd suggest getting a good lawyer like "My
Cousin Vinny" or send a copy of your letter to the American Civil
Liberties Union (ACLU not UCLA) and i'm sure they'll snap to it and
take your case Pro Bono (who could be anti Bono?? hes so kewl)

Again, Good Luck!!

Ok the world can start turning on it's axis again. The load has been
balanced!!! I know there's someone out there with their eyes still
closed!!!!!

obviously this person think that he/she is so damn special that pizza
hut is going to change its menu just because of the fact that she is
such a "valuable" customer. i just love this site it proves me right
so many times it is unbelievable....

What the hell is this letter about? Are you complaining about
something that happened recently or something that happened years ago?
Are you placing an order? Maybe you should be more concerned with your
grammar skills, and less concerned about what pizza hut puts on their
menu. What is the big deal with pizza hut anyway, they have two
complaint letters posted in the top 20!?

Could Jennifer G (see the "I got food poisoning... letter) and sarah m
be related? Nah, just in the same teacher. No periods, run on
sentences. Ok, I understand that schools are cutting budgets, but
this is rediculous, lol.

Sorcha

at band camp...



oh never mind.

Is this supposed to be one long sentence? This is horrible. What the
hell?!

Are you pregnant by chance?


1. Because you're missing your periods.

2. You seem to be having very specific cravings.


I really hope this letter is a joke. As an English major it really
pains me to read this (as I see it does other non-English majors on
here!) - the spelling, the lack of punctuation, etc. What a complete
mess!

OMG! This letter is brutal!

For the love of God, please take some time to learn what capital
letters, periods and commas are used for. Then USE THEM.

Oh gods, where are your periods.

Ok, let me be short and sweet. Pizza hut, or any restaurant, doesn't
cater to every individuals likes and dislikes. If you want things
this specific, do it yourself, or, better yet, open your own pizza
place.

Sorcha

I didn't read this. Go back and use this very wonderful, amazing,
OH-MY-GOD IT IS SO DARN GOOD, thing called a period. . . . . . . .

Please?

Wow, someone sure had the munchies when they wrote their letter...

If you haven't ordered in years, how do you know that things haven't
improved? Why not just try ordering again instead of writing and
asking for all these menu changes and specials?

Not that there ever really is a right time for a gimmee grab, but if
there *were*, it would be at the time of your last unsatisfactory
experience... not years later.

Why not open your own restaurant using your letter as the blueprint?

Are you serious!? This letter is horrible, and if I were Pizza Hut, I
wouldn't hesitate throwing this letter right into the paper shredder.

If you need all your requirements in order to eat something Italian,
then please make it yourself.

sarah aren't you? I think you are what people term "high maintenance"

I think every teacher you ever had should be fired since not one of
them taught you about using caps and puncuation.
This letter should be used as an example of how not to write a letter.

Get a grip - - Pizza Hut is a fast food place - - not a fine Italian
restaurant. You say you don't like the place and you haven't ordered
from them in years, yet you have requested free food and beverages for
which you should be ashamed. Your suggestions are ridiculous for the
type of establishment we're talking about and I'm sure your letter
will hit the round file where it belongs.

Here's a suggestion - - instead of fixating on pizza, why don't you
learn to write a decent letter?

Let's try this one more time, and hope my post doesn't get cut off by
inadvertent HTML tags yet again.

As I was saying ... Lesson time.

. -- This is a period.

, -- This is a comma.

Don't be fooled by appearances. Those aren't just really tiny little
letters. They're actually called punctuation. Punctuation is used to
break up your sentences, so what you're writing doesn't turn into one
long, incomprehensible ramble.

r -- This is a lowercase letter.

R -- This is an uppercase letter.

Notice how the uppercase letter is bigger than the lowercase one?
Good. Uppercase letters are used at the beginning of every sentence.
This is done so you can tell where a new sentence is beginning.
Uppercase letters are also used at the beginning of proper titles,
such as the names of people, businesses, cities, rivers, lakes,
countries, and so forth.

This concludes today's grammar lesson. Tomorrow, we will discuss
spelling. Bring a pencil. You will be tested.

Lesson time.

.

I think you need to find an Italian resturant. Pizza Hut isnt going to
carry all this stuff. They are a fast food place.

I think your expectations are too high.

On the issue of shorter delivery times and the temp of your
pizza...maybe you should try a different location.


"or send me a offer for two free specialty pizzas or dippen sticks
pizzas and cheesebreadsticks with no seasoning and a drink of my
choosing 2 liter of course since i have been so disatisfyed with your
company and i like garlic dipping sauce and ranch as well if you would
also includ free extra dips as well it would be apreciated sincerely
sarah miller of charleston west"

GAG! Pathetic.

You say you havent ordered from there in YEARS but you want them to
totally revamp their menu and their business practices for PLUS send
you free food.

Good try.

Thanks for putting yet another nail in the coffin of customer service.
Because of outrageous letters like this Pizza Hut will be less likely
to take LEGITIMATE complaints seriously.